Dapper Pelts

Google "Handsome Furs" and you will find no shortage of awesome promo pics.

Believe it or not I spend a decent amount of time thinking of all sorts of ways to improve this blog. Most of these (obviously) never come to fruition and perhaps sadly, the best way to improve the ol' RB (simply post more often) is something I am well aware of. With that out of the way I will fess up to an idea I've had for awhile and that is to dedicate posts on Mondays to music seeing as there is such a natural connection between those to concepts with them sharing the same first letter and all. It's always dicey introducing potentially recurring features here at The Reliablog but I'm doing it anyway so for our first and potentially last Music Monday let's talk about a little band (at least in the number of members sense) called Handsome Furs.

One of many bands in what I like to call the "Wolf Parade Family", Handsome Fur is composed of WP guitarist/half-the-time frontman Dan Boeckner and his wife Alexei Perry. Their all important "genres" tag on Wikipedia describes their music as indie rock and post-punk revival. Handsome Furs's first album, Plague Park (2007), was not much of a departure from the typical Wolf Parade sound, just with less instrumentation and a drum machine serving as pretty much the entire rhythm section. It was a solid effort from what most brushed off as a little WP side project. On the 2009 follow-up, Face Control, the band polished their sound by seemingly adding more guitar riffs while not holding back at all on the synths. They shamlessly and admirably aped Joan Jett's "Bad Reputation and New Order's "Temptation" on album standouts "Talking Hotel Arbat City Blues" and "All We Want Baby Is Everything", respectively while also penning some strong wholly original tracks such as "Legal Tender" and "Radio Kaliningrad". But enough about the past output from the Furs, we're here to discuss what they've been up to as of late.

Just last week, Dan and Alexei announced their new album, "Sound Kapital" would be coming out this June along with a tracklist and word of a sound inspired by electronic and industrial music from Eastern Europe in the 80's. Boeckner also explained that this was the first Furs album to be written entiirely on keyboards. Then, in what has to be the shortest ever interval between an album being announced and leaking, a copy of "Sound Kapital" starting making it's rounds throughout the series of tubes. I have been fortunate to hear it (particularly so, since I got this opportunity the day before I saw them play at Brooklyn's The Bell House last Thursday) and I have no problems saying it's the best album I've heard so far this year. I should have maybe prefaced that statement by acknowledging that I have found this to be a pretty underwhelming year in music thus far (it is, after all, only April which means like baseball season in April, lots can change). That said, I do feel comfortable at least saying this is the best Handsome Furs album.

The best way I can describe Sound Kapital is to say that it sounds exactly what you would expect a Handsome Furs album to sound like in 2011. Pretty much all the songs feature synths, lots of synths, and there are plenty of driving beats, or is it beats that drive the songs? While some fans were concerned about this album being written on the keys would mean there'd be no room for guitar riffs they can rest assured that they are mistaken. Songs like "Damage" and "Cheap Music" feature what can be considered standard HF guitar parts. For me though, the standout tracks are less guitar centric songs such as the first single "What About Us", (which can be downloaded at the link with the news above) and my current jam at the moment, "Memories of the Future" which you can listen to here.

You can also check out "Memories..." and a couple other songs from the new album at this site which has some solid quality videos from their concert last Thursday. If you're at all curious as to what the Furs are like in their coked up (more or less their own admission, Boeckner says he likes to write about what he knows and on Thursday night they were open about more than one song being about cocaine) glory, this is a good place to start. The Furs truly put on a frenetic and enjoyable show, certainly getting more into than the crowd at The Bell House did. If they are coming to your area anytime soon I highly recommend checking them out as well as Sound Kapital when it drops in June or has a higher profile/quality leak.

Flat Sides

So yesterday I wrote a needlessly lengthy post about The Strokes, or more accurately my experience(s) with The Strokes. I promised I'd give my thoughts on the new album so let's get right to it, after a very quick explanation of my feelings re: the previous three albums.

Is This It? (2001) - Easily a desert island disc for me, potentially my favorite album of all time. I will fight people who disrespect this album. Not really, but I'd want to.

Room On Fire (2003) - A worthy follow-up to their debut, ROF didn't take any chances but it delivered another strong set of ten songs that arguably doesn't have a dud in the bunch which can't really be said about "Is This It?", When It Started anyone? I realize that's only on the US release but it proves my point so it counts.

First Impressions of Earth (2006) - Somewhat unfairly maligned, bloated album that features arguably the best song The Strokes ever did (You Only Live Once). People often make that point that it would've been a much better album with a shorter track list and I have trouble disagreeing. We'd probably all be better off if we never heard Evening Sun and 15 Minutes but songs like YOLO, Razorblade, and Ize of the World redeem the album a fair amount in my opinion.

Which brings us to...

Angles (2011) - I'll give my thoughts on the album as a whole at the end but first I'll foolishly comment on each track.

1. Machu Picchu - I've heard/read people comparing this song to Phoenix, Duran, Duran, and Men At Work among others. The first time I listened to it I was thrown for a bit of a loop, I'm almost 100% sure that it's the guitar riff that apes Michael Jackson's "Wanna Be Starting Something" that was responsible for this. This song has grown on me though and while it doesn't follow in the tradition of great opening Strokes tracks (Is This It?, What Ever Happened?, and You Only Live Once) it's still a solid song.

2. Under Cover of Darkness - Out for over a month now, if you care about The Strokes you've probably heard this song at least once already. This is easily the most "classic Strokes" song on the album and it might also be the best. Don't really think much more needs to be said about this one.

3. Two Kinds of Happiness - It feels like people have been waiting for The Strokes to turn into The Cars for years now. I remember when 12:51 first came out everybody thought "Room On Fire" would be the album that turned Julian Casablancas into Ric Ocasek. If "Angles" weren't so weird/schizophrenic it might've been the album to pull that off. From the opening drum beats and riff you know exactly which automotive band The Strokes are challenging. Julian even throws in some Ocasek vocal tics to blow their cover just in case you may have missed it in the first place.

4. You're So Right - This is where things begin to get messy. Apparently this is bassist Nikolai Fraiture's stab at writing a song for the band. Unfortunately, the lamest Stroke is responsible with one of the lamer songs on the album. To me this song just sounds like a thinner version of River of Brakelights from Julian Casablancas's solo effort "Phrazes For The Young". At least it's pretty short, making it that much more skippable.

5. Taken For A Fool - So far this seems like one of the more enjoyable "Angles" tracks to sing along to in your car to (very important factor for me). It has a very catchy chorus and a good line or two (I'm partial to "Monday Tuesday is my weekend" even though I can't relate to it whatsoever). I've read a lot of people comparing Julian's singing in the verses to the Red Hot Chili Peppers and Talking Heads. This is no doubt due to some staccato phrasing Julian uses. I hear more RHCP than I do David Byrne but I'm going to go ahead and agree with the Talking Heads comparisons because, well, David Byrne >>>>>>>>> Anthony Kiedis.

6. Games - This might be the biggest departure on the album from anything The Strokes have done previously. The chorus is drenched in more keyboards than anything the band has done previously. Lots of people saying this The Strokes taking a stab at "chillwave" (I know, I hate that genre name just as much as you do) and a friend of mine described it as "Elvis Costello meets The Cars". As for me, I'm struggling to find a good comparison but I either way this song is really growing on me. Julian veers dangerously close to an unlistenable falsetto when he sings "I'm ok, I'm alright, I was out late last night" (one of the best lines on the album in my opinion, I can absolutely relate to that one as I've uttered it many late mornings/early afternoons while making a beeline to the bathroom and/or nearest glass of water) as the track climaxes but he gets out just in time.

7. Call Me Back - First thing that came to my mind when initially hearing this song was Stroke Fab Moretti's side project Little Joy. I think the cassette tape hiss in the background only adds to this vibe as Little Joy's album had a bit of a low-fi bent to it. I've seen this track get panned a decent amount already as if it's the worst song on the album which I think is unfair. Granted the breakdown in the second half of the song induces some cringes from yours truly but it's not nearly as bad as what comes a couple tracks later.

8. Gratisfaction - "I want Thin-Lizzy style, kung-fu rock with cool 80's melodies" - Julian Casablancas when asked about the new Strokes album in 2009. Gratisfaction is pretty much just that, The Strokes doing a take on Thin Lizzy and it's...ok. It kind of just makes me want to listen to an actual Think Lizzy song instead. This song also features backing vocals (as do a few others on the album) which as far as I know is a first for The Strokes.

9. Metabolism - I may have gone a little easy on Call Me Back before but that's only because I knew this song was just around the corner. In my mind this is without any question the worst track on the album. It starts off with a very similar riff to Heart In A Cage (a mediocre track off of FIOE) and doesn't get any better from there. From that point the song turns into what is basically The Strokes doing a Muse song. I suppose there are some people who might be into that sort of thing but I am anything but a Muse fan. This is an unfortunate addition to their catalog but as my friend who made The Cars/Elvis Costello comparison earlier said, at least it's not seven minutes long.

10. Life Is Simple In The Moonlight - The Strokes have a solid history of closing tracks to albums. Take It Or Leave It is a classic, I Can't Win is one of my favorite songs off of ROF, and Red Light is a nice song that gets overlooked. LISITM doesn't come close to TIOLI or ICW but I can't really say it's a lot better or worse than Red Light. My understanding is that this is one of the only songs on this album that Julian has a sole songwriting credit on which makes sense is true. Most of the song grooves like a typical Strokes track with the only glaring issue in the song being the completely unnecessary "don't try to stop us" that Julian tags onto the end of the chorus.

So there you have it, those are pretty much my thoughts after spending a good 48 hours with the entirety of "Angles" (I was familiar with about half the songs on the album before the whole thing finally leaked Sunday). I've probably listened to the entire thing 5 or 6 times now and while I was initially underwhelmed, some of the new songs are starting to grow on me. My initial disappointment was probably heavily influenced by the songs I already knew being the better tracks for the most part. As it stands now this album seems like a high 6/low 7 to me with that rating obviously subject to change as I spend more time with it. I think the real question about this album (at least for me) is how it stacks up to "First Impressions of Earth". Will it be regarded as a step in the right direction for the band or part of a continuous decline? I don't think it's really fair to say one way or another just yet but the next several days should be very interesting as we get to watch the Internet sink their teeth into "Angles" and see whether or not The Strokes get torn to shreds or manage to stay relevant in the end.

Five Years Is Long, Ten Is Longer

I had no idea when I woke up this morning (well barely this morning, thanks to the time change) that today would be a day I've been waiting over five years for (no, it's not the day this blog finally gets an update). Today, after an excruciating wait, I finally got to listen to the latest album from The Strokes. I'll get around to my early thoughts on the album but first...why?

Believe it or not I've actually been trying to update this blog with a post about The Strokes for over a month now. I even had what I thought was a decent start to a post about the first single, Under Cover of Darkness, but it didn't autosave or something and got lost in the ether of the Internet somewhere. How Google is able to keep every other thing we contribute to the Internet and lose my post is beyond me but that's neither here nor there. There have been plenty of articles written about The Strokes in the past few weeks so it's unlikely I have much to add to the conversation beyond my personal experience with the band so that's what we'll have to go with.

On what was probably my third listen of the new album I asked myself why I cared about this band so much. Ever since the 30 second sample of UCoD went online over a month ago I have been devouring any articles/interviews/songs regarding the new album I cant find. Throughout this my expectations for this album have risen to dizzying highs (finally hearing UCoD), fallen to terrifying lows (hearing You're So Right for the first time), and eventually settling into a creamy middle. That sounds kind of dirty but I assure you it's just a poorly used Simpsons quote.

Now a big part of all this is obviously that The Strokes are one my favorite bands, I can say Top 3 with little hesitation. The length of time since their last release and the countless stories, quotes, etc. regarding turmoil with the band also added to all the uncertainty surrounding "Angles". Still, that does not explain why I and others I know were anticipating and sweating out the wait so much. If this were a new album from say Modest Mouse or Spoon I'd be really excited but not nearly as invested in the outcome like I am with The Strokes. Part of this is because neither Modest Mouse or Spoon seems to be in any risk of no longer being a band in the near future whereas The Strokes throw out the idea of being a group no longer more often than I start a blog post and never finish it (it happens a lot more than you might think). The other reason for this emotional investment is that for me (and many others I think) The Strokes are very much a throwback to a different era of music.

When I say "throwback" in this context I don't mean the actual music, even if that word was brought up a lot when The Strokes first broke onto the scene more than ten years ago, I mean it more in the sense of following a band's career. You don't need me to point out that acquiring and listening to music back then was a completely different experience than it is today, and I'm not going to wax poetic about the pre-Napster/iPod/Grooveshark era or anything like that, I just think it's worth noting that when The Strokes first album dropped I was carrying my Discman and wallet of CD's to and from high school every day. In the months leading up to "Is This It?"'s release I had been listening to mix CD's my friends had made that featured early versions of Last Nite, Hard To Explain, and The Modern Age. We are all pretty amped up for the album when it finally came out. I can still vividly remember getting a ride from my dad to Tower Records to pick up my copy and coming home to listen to it on what was probably a less than warm October night.

A couple years later "Room On Fire" came out. If my memory serves me correct this was still before albums would regularly "leak" and people would get their hands on them ahead of time. I do recall MTV putting the album up to stream on their website a week or so before it's released. I managed to stay strong at the time and listen to only about ten seconds of "Between Love and Hate" before deciding to hold out until getting my hands on a physical copy. When it eventually did come out I once again procured a ride (this time from my college roommate) on the day of release.

By the time "First Impressions of Earth" leaked in December 2005 (it would be released for real the next month) we were in the midst of a sea change when it came to music. People with white ear buds hanging from their heads were a common sighting and some of us who were Internet savvy (or had Internet savvy friends) were sometimes getting to listen to albums days/weeks/months before their physical release. FiOE is one of the first albums I can remember listening to the leak of (it's also the last album I can remember planning on buying even after I had downloaded it, never did end up picking it up though). It actually leaked in a fashion similar to "Angles", with songs trickling out one by one until the full album eventually showed up.

I'm not really sure if there is actually a point being made here or not. I could be onto something with this silly "throwback" notion but it's likely I that I care so much about this album because The Strokes have made several awesome songs that I listen to constantly and I want them to continue to do so. What I can safely say is this: for me, as The Strokes musical career progressed, so did the way that I (and everyone else) anticipate, acquire, and listen to music. When they started out we were still dragging ourselves to the nearest Tower Records, Barnes & Noble, local record store, etc. to get the music. I'm pretty sure that when I learned "Angles" had leaked I wasn't wearing any pants, and if I were wearing them they were sweatpants. I queued up the download, went to take a shower, and fifteen minutes later the new album was on my computer waiting to be judged, which I will do in a post tomorrow because this has gone on way longer than I anticipated.

Makeshift Conspiracy Theory #1

If you're like me and you follow Chik-Fil-A on multiple social media platforms you were probably aware that this past Friday (3/4) was Free FryDay at participating Chik-Fil-A's.

(Quick confession re: my stupidity - I did not make the Friday/FryDay connection until I read a Chik-Fil-A tweet out loud to my roommate and actually said the word "FryDay". In my defense, my roommate also didn't realize it was a homonym until I said it to him.)

Chik-Fil-A made no secret that the FryDay campaign was to introduce people to Heinz's new "Dip and Squeeze" ketchup packets which not only promised to dispense three times as much ketchup as a regular Heinz ketchup packet, but also allow the user to dip or squeeze the ketchup contained within. But I'm not writing this to question the promises Heinz is making with this new ketchup vehicle, I'm more curious about the motivations for bringing this ketchup capsule into the picture.

One of my favorite things about Chik-Fil-A (despite it being by far the best "fast food" franchise that exists on the face of the Earth) was how they allowed you to take as many ketchup packets as you liked. The last time I had went to Chik-Fil-A before this afternoon was the first time I had been introduced to the new "Dip and Squeeze" packets.

The new packets (pictured above), like their name indicates, can be used to dip fries in or squeezed to pour out the ketchup ala the old packets. Now I have no problem with these new packets, what concerns me is how the Chik-Fil-A I frequent no longer has the tray of ketchup packets that allowed people to take as many as they wanted. Now patrons are forced to ask for ketchup as if it were mayonnaise or one of the various delicious sauces Chik-Fil-A offers. To me, this is just a needless nuisance in the ordering process.

You may be wondering where the conspiracy theory is in all of this so here goes: I propose that Chik-Fil-A (or perhaps Heinz since this is their ketchup innovation) came to the conclusion that an unacceptable amount of ketchup was going to waste by leaving out hundreds of packets for the taking. I'm thinking they used the introduction of the "dip and squeeze" packets as an opportunity to remove the tray of old school packets and that "Free FryDay" was a way to distract the masses from this change by offering a free order of fries for a few hours. Now maybe this is only the case at my local Chik-Fil-A and I am completely overreacting, but I fear this is not the case. No longer will I be able to take entirely too much ketchup and debate whether or not it's worth putting the extra packets at the end of my meal back where they came from (my reasoning being they may think somebody putting packets back in the tray is shady), but at least it'll be much easier to dip my fries from here on out I suppose.

Worst. World Series. Ever.

Over the past few days, since the Yankees secured a berth in the World Series, there has been a lot written about how terrible this matchup is for Mets fans. I have trouble sitting on the fence when it comes to things like these so I figured I should work my way through this decision. There's really only one way to break down such an impossible choice: Journey Vs. Boston style. Let's get to it:

Stadiums:

I hate hitter's parks, can't stand them. While there has obviously only been one season played at the new Yankee Stadium and many will argue that the sample size is not big enough, I feel pretty comfortable saying that it's going to be favorable to hitters, that right field "porch" in particular. If you've ever watched a game at Citizen's Bank Park you know that the ball flies out of there, even after they moved the fences back a few years ago. So you can assume (and you'd be correct) that I hate how both of these stadiums play. Aesthetically, I think they both look ridiculous. CBP is one of the new breed of "quirky" stadiums that feature what I find to be an artificial type of charm. NYS has so many ads in the outfield that it almost resembles a minor league park. While I haven't made it out to NYS yet, I have been to a few games at CBP and it's a pretty enjoyable place to watch a game despite the presence of Phillies fans. I've actually been able to go there and wear Mets stuff without incident for the most part. This, combined with the fact that a 16 oz. PBR costs you $9 at NYS swings this category in the Phillies favor, though I admit I can't judge NYS very fairly.

Edge: Phillies

Most Obnoxious Players:

Not even sure where to begin with this one, so let's first narrow down the candidates on the two teams' World Series rosters (all caps for players I find particularly reprehensible):

Yankees:

Jorge Posada

Derek Jeter

Robinson Cano

JOBA CHAMBERLAIN

Phillies:

JIMMY ROLLINS

SHANE VICTORINO

BRETT MYERS

Despite the fact that I've hated the Yankees much longer than I have the Phillies, those three Phillies players make this decision particularly easy. As I've become a more knowledgeable baseball fan over the years (thanks to the plethora of information available on the Internet) what I've realized is the players I can't stand the most are the ones who are, in my mind, hideously overrated. Joba, Victorino, and Rollins all fall in this category, particularly Joba and Rollins. Joba has really done nothing in his career yet I still see people walking around wearing "Got Joba" t-shirts. Rollins had an on base percentage below .300 this year (just awful) and stole an MVP from David Wright in 2007 solely because he made some stupid comments before the season. I don't really need to explain Jeter and Posada, but at least they're good (ok, great) players. As for Victorino, he's a dirty player and talks a lot of shit about the Mets supposed dancing in the dugout for a guy who spends about 20 seconds on top of home plate every time he scores.

And then you have Brett Myers. As much as I hate Joba, J-Roll, & co., Myers is the worst of all. This is a guy who beat his wife. Unacceptable. He might be the most despicable player in baseball.

Edge: Yankees

Oh, and before I get away from Brett Myers, this:

Managers:

Tim Marchman wrote a much more interesting piece about the differences between these two managers than I ever could in a million years. Surprisingly, postseason has made me think that Girardi is a worse manager than Manuel. His over-managing has hurt the Yankees in many spots.

Edge: Phillies

The Fans:

This is a big one. I'm not really sure where to start. I guess we can talk about the difference between Yankees fans and Phillies fans. After the Phillies dropped the second game of their Division Series against the Rockies I received a call from one of my Phillies fan friends. He wanted to let me know that he wasn't worried. I told him he shouldn't be, the series was tied and the Phillies were the better team. I don't think it was my friend's intent to annoy me. Contrast this with when I was sitting around watching the Giants game a couple Sundays ago and I mentioned how if the ALCS were to go to seven games, the Yankees would play at the same time as the Giants. Immediately all the Yankee fans in the room informed that there was no way the series would go seven games. That is the difference between these two fanbases in a nutshell. Phillies fans haven't quite reached the point where they expect to win (unless it's against the Mets) while it didn't take long at all for Yankee fans to get back to that point. Who am I kidding though, both groups piss me off.

There is one edge that Phillies fans have over Yankee fans in this series though. They don't expect Mets fans to root for their team. I've heard from multiple Yankee fans about how I have to root for the Yankees because they're from New York and the Phillies are a division rival and blah blah blah. All I can say to that is fuck you. If there's one thing I don't appreciate (and there isn't one, there's many) it's being told who I should root for. It's bad enough that I have to make a decision one way or another, I don't need the same Yankee fans who have been giving me shit for years telling me what I should think.

Edge: Phillies

This, combined with the fact that I want to wrap this up brings us to...

The Verdict:

A couple years ago another friend of mine who is also a Mets fan were being grilled as to why we hated the Yankees so much. It's a fair question that my friend had a great answer to: we went to high school from 1998-2002. Not only did the Yankees win three world series in this time, the Mets were pretty decent most of those years, resulting in a lot of back and forth between Mets and Yankees fans. We would constantly hear about how much the Mets sucked (even when they didn't actually suck) and get asked why we rooted for the Yankees. Yankee fans had the upper hand the entire time obviously, the low point being the Mets losing to the Yankees in the World Series.

Some other things that swing this in the Phillies favor are the fact that Philadelphia already broke it's championship "curse" last season. If they hadn't, this would be a much more difficult decision. Also, when you get down to it, the Phillies are the third most popular team in that city. The Eagles are definitely number one in that city and the Flyers (they're all white and gritty!) are number two.

I should also add, that despite how much the Phillies and their fans can't stop chirping about the Mets (seriously, the obsession is kind of ridiculous) and how they choked away the last two seasons, in my eyes the Mets were more responsible for that then anything else.

You might ask me why not just boycott the series and avoid watching it? My response is that I just can't do that. I've only successfully boycotted one World Series in my lifetime (1999 Braves Vs. Yankees) and that was mostly due to having my heart ripped out more than any other sports team when the Mets lost in the NLCS. I'm a big baseball/sports fan, I have trouble pulling myself away. I'm also kind of a masochist.

So yeah, barring enough rain to cancel the World Series, I'm rooting for the Phillies.

I'm going to go take a shower now.

One Quick Thing Regarding Fast Food In 2009

Domino's is making sandwiches.
Taco Bell is making enchiladas.
Pizza Hut is making pasta and lasagna.
Dunkin Donuts is making sandwiches with waffles as bread.


There are no rules anymore.

Poll Position

Over the past few years the content from ESPN.com's Page 2 section has become progressively more worthless. Four or five years ago you would not be that hard-pressed to find something at least slightly interesting there outside of Bill Simmons's latest work. Nowadays there really isn't much to offer. Today I came across something that piqued my interest ever so slightly, their State of the Sports Union poll. It's basically 50 questions about different aspects of sports. I took the poll and found the questions and answers to actually be kind of thought provoking. Since I haven't updated in a while I figured I'd go over the results/my answers (in bold).


1) What is your gender?

96.3% Male
3.7% Female

96.3% of a sample of ESPN.com's readership is male? Shocking.

2) How old are you?

49.0% 25-36
33.2% 18-24
10.2% 37-45
3.8% 46-60
3.5% Younger than 18
0.4% Older than 60

Not much to see here, another not surprising answer.

3) Which time zone do you live in?

57.6% Eastern
23.8% Central
11.4% Pacific
5.8% Mountain
1.4% Other

Clearly the East Coast is where it's at, but you already knew that.

4) What is your favorite sport?

35.2% NFL
22.8% Major League Baseball
17.0% College football
8.1% College basketball (men)
6.0% NHL
5.7% NBA
2.3% Soccer
0.8% Other
0.7% Golf
0.5% Ultimate fighting
0.4% Tennis
0.3% NASCAR
0.2% College basketball (women)

Not surprisingly the NFL comes in first, I was a little surprised at MLB finishing second, however. I guess baseball fans are kind of nerdy and, therefore, are more likely to participate in ESPN.com polls. The NBA finishing below the NHL is interesting too, don't know how to explain that. This is a great opportunity for me take a shot at NBA Commissioner David Stern (in my opinion one of, if not the most overrated commissioner of all time) but I'll stay classy and move on.

5) How many professional or college sporting events did you attend in the past year?

40.5% 1-5
23.9% 6-10
15.5% 11-20
12.7% More than 20
7.4% None

I'm pretty sure I only went to 1-5 events this year. Don't think I went to anything outside of a few baseball games.

6) Which did you attend more often in the past year?

57.4% A sports event
37.1% A movie
5.5% A concert

I don't really see a lot of movies but I probably went to more movies than I did sporting events this year.

7) Describe your favorite team:

69.6% Professional team
29.4% College team
1.0% High school team

I can understand answering college team for this question, but high school team? Really? At least it's only 1.0%

8) What's the most you spent on a sports ticket in the past year?

32.7% $51-$100
21.0% $101-$250
20.7% $26-$50
10.7% Less than $10
8.3% $10-$25
6.5% More than $250

Upper Deck seats at Shea/Standing Room at Citizen's Bank Park were pretty affordable in 2008. We'll see if that's the case this year at Citifield.

9) What is the farthest you traveled to see a sporting event in the past year?

48.6% Less than 100 miles
32.0% 100-499 miles
9.6% 500-999 miles
5.3% 1,000-1,999 miles
4.4% More than 2,000 miles

I just had to double-check to make sure I answered this correctly since I drove to Philadelphia for a Mets/Phillies game last Spring. Depending on whether you count the distance to Philly or the stadium I may or not have answered this question properly. Oh well.

10) In the past year, how many times did you call in sick to attend a sporting event?

79.0% None
12.8% 1
7.1% 2-3
0.6% 4-5
0.4% More than 5

Can't call in sick if you've got nowhere to call.

11) Which is your favorite place to watch a game?

52.3% At the stadium, where I can see it in person
33.8% At home on the couch
9.7% At a sports bar, where I can get a beer for less than $8
4.3% At a party, where I can socialize

I didn't really know how to answer this question. I enjoy going to sporting events but I enjoy watching them on TV almost as much. The beer is cheaper, you don't have to go home afterwards, and you don't have to battle the elements ever.

12) How many hours a week do you spend watching sporting events on TV?

42.6% 6-10
28.7% 11-20
14.5% More than 20
14.2% Less than 5

This really changes for me depending on the season but on average throughout the year it's probably 6-10. I wrack up a lot of hours during baseball seasons plus during football season I watch around 2 full games a week which is 4,5 hours right there.

13) Do you own an HDTV?

66.4% Yes
33.6% No

...but I really really wish I did.

14) Did you play on an organized sports team in the past year?

51.1% Yes
48.9% No

Flip Cup teams don't count right?

15) How many jerseys do you own?

46.2% 2-5
20.2% None
15.5% 1
13.4% 6-12
4.8% More than 12

I might own 6, I didn't do an official count. The more I think about it the more confident I am that I answered correctly though.

16) Where do you wear your jersey?

42.4% At a game or around the house
31.6% Only if I attend the game in person or at a sports bar
26.0% Anywhere, anytime

26% of people answered "Anywhere, anytime"? Yikes. That's why I don't go to a lot of live sporting events, my interaction with these people would probably not go smoothly. This is not entirely their fault though, I'd probably bring much of it upon myself. I should be able to applaud a David Wright basehit at the McFadden's attached to Citizen's Bank Park without having a couple Philly douchebags trying to fight me, however.

17) Excluding sports equipment, how much did you spend on sports merchandise (clothing, video games, collectible cards, etc.) in the past year?

44.3% $50-$199
22.3% $200-$500
18.7% $1-$49
8.7% $0
6.0% More than $500

Initially I thought it might be less (and it still may be), but I spent $20-something on a Giants hat in December so that's half of the total right there.

18) Did you participate in a for-money NCAA tournament poll in 2008?

40.0% No
31.6% Yes, the entry fee was $10 or less
26.9% Yes, the entry fee was $11-$99
1.5% Yes, the entry fee was $100 or more

I was surprised to that No was the top answer here, I guess there's lots of people who fill out brackets without putting money on them. Those people are lame.

19) What's the most you wagered on a single sports event in the past year?

34.2% I don't gamble
26.2% $11-$50
17.5% $1-$10
11.0% $51-$100
8.9% $101-$500
2.3% More than $500

The people from the previous question are lame. Not as lame as the people who said "I don't gamble" for this question.

20) Do you play online poker for money?

88.3% No
11.7% Yes

Come on Page 2, you don't know how hard it is to make a deposit for online poker nowadays. Not that I would know about that or anything...

21) Did you play in a fantasy league that had an entry fee?

54.9% No
30.0% Yes, and I lost
15.1% Yes, and I won

This one made me feel good about myself.

22) How many hours a week do you spend on your fantasy team(s)?

32.8% None, I don't play
29.5% 1-2
23.8% 3-5
8.7% 6-10
5.2% More than 10

This one made me feel even better about myself. I'm not sure if I actually spend 3-5 hours a week on my fantasy teams but if you count scoreboard watching, talking to teammates/other league members that's three hours easy.

23) Have you scalped (sold) a ticket in the past year?

82.9% No
9.3% Yes, at the venue
7.7% Yes, online

Nothing to see here really.

24) Have you purchased a scalped ticket in the past year?

63.5% No
19.9% Yes, online
16.6% Yes, at the venue

Same here.

25) How many hours a week do you spend playing sports video games?

44.4% None
38.0% 1-5
12.0% 6-10
4.0% 11-20
1.6% More than 20

It could easily be more if I had an XBox 360 but I don't.

26) The biggest sports rip-off is:

32.2% $8 stadium beer
22.1% Using municipal tax dollars to build team owners shiny new stadiums
20.1% Personal seat licenses
18.1% Ticket prices
7.6% Forcing NFL season-ticket holders to buy tickets to preseason games

I don't know why I didn't answer beer. I guess I just think PSL's are really lame. Using municipal tax dollars is also pretty shitty as well.

27) Who is the best coach in America?

23.7% Other
19.7% Bill Belichick
11.6% Mike Krzyzewski
7.2% Phil Jackson
6.3% Pat Summitt
6.0% Mike Tomlin
6.0% Pete Carroll
5.5% Urban Meyer
3.9% Gregg Popovich
2.3% Jim Tressel
2.3% Roy Williams
2.2% Joe Torre
1.6% Mike Babcock
0.8% Geno Auriemma
0.8% Rick Pitino

I don't know how anyone could make an argument other than Belichick. Coach K or Phil Jackson maybe but I'd still go with Belicheat. I'd like to know who the people who answered "Other" were considering.

28) Would you rather:

55.5% Own your favorite NFL team
26.8% Quarterback your favorite NFL team
17.8% Be the GM of your favorite NFL team

Here are your three options:
1. A high pressure, well paying job as a football executive where you have to work all year long and answer to your owner, fans, and the media.
2. An extremely well paying high pressure job where you get the shit kicked out of you 16+ times a year with at least a couple months off each year. Also, you can have sex with almost any attractive female in your home city.
3. You clearly have a ton of money seeing as you own a team in the most successful professional sports league in America. You are your own boss and call all the shots about everything from the coaching staff, personnel, uniforms (one of the most underrated aspect of being an owner in my opinion), on down to the post-game food spread. You can easily dismiss of those who disagree/betray you and you can afford to have sex with attractive females across the globe.

Yeah, I'd choose #3 as well.

29) Would you rather:

30.9% Hang out as Derek Jeter's wingman for an evening
21.5% Watch a game with Mark Cuban
20.1% Go clubbing with Charles Barkley
17.0% Play a round of golf with John Daly
10.5% Party with Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson

Being a Mets fan I'm clearly not a big Derek Jeter guy. That said, his track record when it comes to the ladies is nothing short of remarkable. I think there could be a lot to be learned from being his wingman. Lesson #1: Make millions playing SS and winning four World Series in the greatest city in the world and the ladies will love you.

30) Would you rather:

55.4% Be given free season tickets to your favorite team
44.6% Be promoted at work

I could use a job more than season tickets to the Mets.

31) Would you rather:

72.2% See your favorite team win a championship
27.8% Have one night of passion with Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt

One night is not enough. I devote too many other nights to my favorite teams for me to choose against the ultimate payoff.

32) Would you rather:

72.5% Watch Game 2 of the NBA Finals, Stanley Cup or World Series
27.5% Watch the season finale of your favorite TV show

I realize this is a controversial choice but I answered this with the obvious stipulation that one of my favorite teams would not be playing in these events. Of course season finales usually air in May so it's unlikely they would interfere with any of these things anyway. And isn't this why we have DVR's and the internet. This is a stupid question.

33) What was sports' biggest sin over the past year?

23.0% Brett Favre retirement and trade saga
22.0% Plaxico Burress shooting himself in the thigh and missing the rest of the season
19.3% Utah not playing in the BCS title game
14.2% Manny Ramirez not hustling to get his way out of Boston
14.2% High school girls' basketball game that ended 100-0
5.6% World Series game played in a downpour
1.6% Michael Phelps admitting to smoking a marijuana bong

This is a weird question. Are people saying Favre committed the sin here? Whatever, I thought that whole 100-0 situation was kind of messed up, especially when the coach refused to apologize. I think of all these options that guy was the biggest dick. Two other things about this:
1. Glad Phelps came in last, the outrage over that is ridiculous. His DWI was much, much worse.
2. My not voting for Plax had nothing to do with being a Giants fan. I genuinely believe Plax isn't a bad guy, he's just a total moron.

34) The most admirable sports figure is:

36.3% Tony Dungy
18.3% Myron Rolle
16.5% Kurt Warner
10.5% Tim Tebow
9.4% Warrick Dunn
9.1% Mike Krzyzewski

Didn't really know how to answer this one. I remember hearing Warrick Dunn's life story about losing his father(?) and having to support his family at a young age. That seems pretty admirable to me.

35) The coolest person in sports is:

21.8% LeBron James
17.8% Tiger Woods
12.0% Tom Brady
8.4% Larry Fitzgerald
6.6% Derek Jeter
5.1% Alex Ovechkin
5.0% Troy Polamalu
4.4% Shaun White
4.3% David Beckham
3.3% Tim Tebow
3.1% Kobe Bryant
2.5% Dale Earnhardt Jr.
2.1% Rafael Nadal
1.9% Ben Roethlisberger
1.8% Sidney Crosby

Somehow I missed LeBron and didn't even consider him, he's the only guy I would've considered over Brady. Interesting where Ovechkin is related to Crosby and I'm glad to see Big Ben down there.

36) Which do you prefer?

65.0% Character
35.0% Talent

I answered this question with regard to what I want on the teams I root for. I don't care if you're a dick just so long as you help my team and don't shoot yourself in the leg. Or slam strippers' heads into poles and have your entourage paralyze a bouncer. Or beat your hot wife. Or beat your ugly wife. I guess character is somewhat important.

37) Which do you prefer?

66.4% Winning percentage
33.6% Graduation rate

College coaches' jobs are to win games.

38) Which do you prefer?

50.5% Ultimate fighting
49.5% Boxing

Not a surprising answer but it hurts to see. I'm not really a boxing fan but I can't stand ultimate fighting, I think it's one of the most boring sports on the planet.

39) Story you got most tired of hearing about in the past year:

53.8% Brett Favre retiring/coming back/getting traded/he's back!/he stinks!
13.5% Terrell Owens and Tony Romo friends/not friends
12.3% Roger Clemens shots in butt/no shots in butt
9.6% Pacman Jones sign him/not sign him/misunderstood/bad dude
5.6% LeBron James future Knick?/future Cavalier?/future Clipper?
2.8% Texas/Oklahoma snubbed/not snubbed
2.4% Manny Ramirez clubhouse cancer/great player/contract situation

Very happy to see more than half the people voted for Favre. Good to know tons of other people are fed up with him as well. Maybe this will make ESPN focus on him less? No, that's not happening.

40) Which sport do you think has the worst officiating?

45.7% NBA
26.4% NFL
11.6% College basketball
9.4% College football
4.5% Major League Baseball
2.3% NHL

There's really no other answer after the Donaghy scandal. Good work Stern.

41) What would you most love to get rid of?

22.6% Football players preening after picking up ho-hum first downs
22.1% Playoff games starting at 9 p.m. ET
14.4% Automatic bids from conference champs into BCS bowl games
13.2% World Series home-field advantage determined by All-Star Game winner
10.0% Several lower-tier bowl games
8.8% Piped-in music, fake crowd noise blasting during play in NBA games
7.8% Timeouts in the final minute of basketball games
1.1% Fighting in hockey

Playoff games start to late, it's not fair to children or anyone else for that matter. Only 1.1% voting for "fighting in hockey" is good to see. I'm not ever going to become a true hockey fan if there's no fighting.

42) What would you most love to see?

34.3% A salary cap for Major League Baseball
16.7% College athletic programs held accountable for athletes' academic performance
11.8% The Super Bowl played on a Saturday
8.5% Modest pay for college football and basketball players
6.8% Seeded tournament for NFL playoffs
6.3% Tougher drug testing
4.0% More fighting in hockey
3.2% More use of instant replay by officials
3.1% Fans allowed to make noise in golf
2.2% Revised rules for college football overtime
2.1% The return of "The Superstars" competition
1.0% Fans allowed to make noise in tennis

None of these really interested me so I chose drug testing.

43) Have you ever passed up sex to watch sports?

62.0% No
38.0% Yes

Not that I've often had the option.

44) Which of the following sports did you play the most in the past year?

22.0% Basketball
16.2% Golf
15.5% Baseball/softball
11.2% Beer pong
10.0% Football (touch/tackle/flag)
6.2% Soccer
4.3% Bowling
3.8% Ice hockey/roller hockey
3.2% Tennis
2.9% Swimming
2.6% Skiing/snowboarding
2.0% Volleyball
0.2% Skateboarding

I didn't really play much Beer Pong/Beirut this past year, but I don't think I could answer anything else. Wiffleball isn't an option.

45) In the past year, have you booed a player or coach on one of your favorite teams?

58.6% Yes
41.4% No

I don't boo, makes you look/sound like an idiot. I will yell witty, derisive comments when necessary.

46) Which of the following do you find most reprehensible?

45.3% Players who don't hustle
36.6% Performance-enhancing drugs
12.7% Offensive linemen who use cut blocking on opponents' knees
3.6% Late hits on quarterbacks
1.8% Corked bat/throwing a spitball

Almost voted for "Late hits on quarterbacks" but players on my teams who don't hustle piss me off more. Yes I still want Manny on the Mets.

47) Which statement do you most agree with?

38.7% Professional athletes are overpaid
16.4% The NFL has become too much of a "pansy game" (as Troy Polamalu said)
15.2% College athletes try harder than professional athletes
11.5% College athletes in revenue-generating sports should be paid
5.7% Professional athletes work harder at their jobs than I do
4.7% The NFL should adopt its own minor league system
2.8% Ultimate fighting should be banned
2.2% The NFL should strictly regulate on-field player celebrations
1.6% Professional athletes should be allowed to use performance-enhancing drugs under responsible medical supervision
1.1% The NHL should eliminate fighting

Well they are.

48) Which would you rather have?

58.9% $5,000
41.1% Your favorite team win a championship

I thought this was one of the best questions in the poll, it was actually the one I read about in the headline that made me click on the link. I mulled this one over and went with my initial gut feeling. The way I see it if you're being given the option between the two than the whole fun of your team winning it all is spoiled. Now if I could take away a championship like the 2000 Yankees or this year's Phillies I might have to reconsider the question.

49) Considering the economy, do you anticipate you'll be spending more or less on sports in 2009?

64.1% About the same
28.1% Less
7.8% More

Don't really see the amount I spend changing much, I'm still poor either way.

50) Would you say you are more or less of a sports fan than five years ago?

49.5% More
39.2% About the same
11.3% Less

On second thought I may be more of a sports fan now but I can't really say for sure.

Total Votes: 36,608

(and counting)